I know it sound crazy, right? But I’m an insane girl who has a caller that enjoys farting phone sex. Even though I’ve yet to fart on a call for him (he only grabs 10s), we just talk about my farts and how I like to announce to every one of my friends that I just pooted and tooted in their presence. It really turns him on and I find that playful and funny. Who thinks farts aren’t funny? I talk about the time I had my round butt pressed up against a wooden kitchen chair and it made the biggest rumbling sound ever. Whoaaa thunderous boom farts coming out of my pink little starfish. You think I’m kidding? Ask any of my girlfriends. My farts smell like rose petals and when I toot, glitter shoots out of my ass like fuckin fairy dust. Don’t hate. At least I know my farting phone sex caller will always love me.
I just enjoy new fetishes and fantasies no matter what they may be. My fucked up psycho brain wants to hear allllll about them no matter how crazy you think they are. I’m already crazier than that. Farting phone sex isn’t so far fetched. I’ve heard it all from hiccups to grunting animal sounds. Yes, he wanted me to grunt like an animal and every time I came he wanted me to lose brain cells so he was fucking me stupid. Legit, fucking me stupid. It was awesome! lol Getting fucked so hard pretending I can’t form sentences and believing cum was my only source of food. Yeah, that’s because I’m the nastiest little slut you’ll ever meet and that’s why you won’t be afraid to share your crazy fantasies with me.
xoxoxox Andrea
